Little Ears Are Listening
Have you ever caught yourself saying something critical about your body? A passing comment, almost automatic: “Ugh, I hate how this looks on me,” or “I wish I could just lose this.”
Now imagine the little ears that might be nearby, soaking up every word.
When I became a mum and an aunty, I started noticing the way I spoke about myself—especially in front of my kids and the little ones in my life. I realised that my words weren’t just shaping how I saw myself; they were shaping how the next generation would see themselves.
Studies show that negative self-talk doesn’t just affect us—it’s contagious. Children who hear adults criticise their own bodies often internalise those messages, which can lead to body dissatisfaction and low self-esteem as they grow. The words we casually throw out can become the script that plays in their minds.
Self-compassion isn’t just a gift to ourselves—it’s something we should and want to ensure the next generation are better at than we are. When we speak kindly about ourselves, we’re teaching our daughters, sons, nieces, nephews, and every young person who looks up to us, that their worth isn’t tied to their reflection.
Think about it: when we celebrate what we love about ourselves, we’re modeling a way of thinking that helps them see beauty, strength, and value in themselves, too. If they see us embrace our imperfections and appreciate our bodies for what they can do, they’re more likely to grow up with a healthier, kinder perspective about their own.
So how do we start? Let’s take small, intentional steps:
- Catch the Criticism
The next time a negative thought about your body creeps in, pause. Recognise it for what it is: just a thought, not a truth. - Reframe with Positivity
Replace that criticism with something you’re proud of. Instead of, “I hate my stomach,” try, “I’m proud of what my body has carried me through.” - Model Self-Acceptance
Celebrate yourself openly, especially in front of children. Say things like, “I feel strong today,” or “I love how this colour looks on me.” These statements show them it’s okay to feel good about yourself. - Shift the Focus
Compliment others on traits beyond their appearance. “You’re so creative,” or “I love how kind you are,” helps reinforce that value isn’t tied to looks.
It’s not always easy to break old habits, but every time we choose kindness toward ourselves, not only is it helping us, but it is setting an example for those around us.
So, let’s be intentional. Let’s change the conversation—not just for ourselves, but for them.
Nichola xx